Pam Halter
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The Things People Say - part five
Tuesday, October 9, 2012 by pam

"You're so special. I couldn't do what you do."

I’m no different from anyone else. I’m human. I’m not perfect. I do great some days; I mess up some days. What makes me any more special than anyone else? When I hear this comment, I always think the person making this observation must be thankful they don’t have a child like Anna. Giving me this compliment somehow makes them feel not guilty for feeling relieved. You know what? There’s nothing wrong with being thankful or relieved you aren’t the parent of a special needs child. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, but every family has their problems. Sure, mine is different from yours, but problems are problems, and the emotions they create are the same. Fear is fear. Worry is worry. Frustration is frustration. Joy is joy. And so on.

Here’s another situation where I would rather hear, “Wow, that must be hard some days.”


Comments

Susan From Chalfont, Pa At 10/9/2012 4:56:59 PM

Another fine example of sympathy vs. empathy. When my first husband died young, I was encouraged by empathy, not sympathy. Sympathy = pity to me.

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